To Love Means to Give or Share

Not to take. Is this an advanced state of mind and spirit? Not really, Children after the stage of not seeing the difference between me and mom, after ending the stage of parallel play, actually care for one another, also for animals and sometimes plants. They do this if their parents do not interfere, do not pull the child away from something designated dangerous, do not set evaluation in the way: “we look down on them” or they do not deserve it, or they would take from you or… anything to set walls between their child and the other which progressively land repeatedly puts an end to empathy.

Our society has not much-endorsed empathy although we claim to be an open heart society. We need to remember that the country was founded on theft and murder. The robbers, Cortez and Columbus were debtors who were into profit. Cortez said that they, exploiters were seriously injured for which the only cure was gold. Columbus destroyed the Taino Indians of Caribbean islands, demanding that they produce gold from the river and mine or die, mothers were killed, babies ripped from the womb, limbs were cut off for insufficient gold production. The occupied were killed for sport. Columbus and Co. almost wiped out the Taino population.

It goes on and on. America was not the Tierra Vida, the empty land available for settling when the impoverished Europeans arrived. The ethnics who were in the millions, were given false treaties, killed or set on the “trail of tears” to someplace else.

The idea of my taking what I want from you has a long history. It is due to this past that we have a divided mind. NYS Prisoners in jail cost the taxpayer $200,000 a year. Why not send them to Harvard for 1/3 the price? Jailing the impoverished has become a profit-making solution for those who own the prison since the poor were made excess after offering their jobs to people willing to work for less on foreign shores. It is all about short-term profit for the few. That soon no one can afford to buy their foreign made objects is not yet in consciousness.

How are we to learn to love which means to give and share rather than just to take as created by history heartless taking? It is like swimming upstream. However, the winning feature of a give-share experience is that it feels good! It feels good to see another smiling face due to our efforts. It is a living exchange between us rather than a number in the bank. Research shows that people involved in helping are far happier than those involved in getting. You do not hear this in the news as people with megabucks display their latest mink or car. But it is true.

Do an experiment. Do something which rewards you and you alone. See how you feel afterwards, not right away, give it a couple of days. Then do something which clearly creates a smiling face, a tie between you and them. See how you feel afterwards. Take a few days. My bet, based on my own reactions is that you will have the same warm feelings day after day, for always. It is surrendering of your isolation and entering the living world. It is what children feel when they help another child or animal or plant, the great oneness of us all.

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